You Are Beautiful and Amazing

James 3:1-12; 5:12

“A word out of your mouth may seem of no account, but it can accomplish nearly anything – or destroy it!  By our speech we can ruin the world, turn harmony to chaos, throw mud on a reputation, send the whole world up in smoke and go up in smoke with it.” James 3:5,6 (MSG)

Over and over in new age, self-help and Christian books I’ve read about the power of thought and word.  What I say can have profound impact on myself and others. 

In The Four Agreements, the first agreement is: “Be impeccable with your word.” Don Miguel Ruiz writes that, “Mostly we use the word to spread our personal poison – to express anger, jealousy, envy and hate.” (p. 33)  My words are poison when I use them negatively.  Gossip spreads poison.  If I speak unfavorably about someone, it can change others’ views of that person and it can make that person feel badly if she takes it to heart. 

Growing up, I heard over and over again at school and at home that I didn’t do things right.  Whether it was because I didn’t do them the way someone else thought I should or because I kept getting into trouble, I did things “wrong.”  I came to expect I would be a constant disappointment.  As a result, the idea took root and I struggled with it into adulthood.  I always have been much harder on myself than I need to be.  And if based on what I’d learned from experience I thought I didn’t do something “right,” I felt like a failure. 

This was a heavy and unnecessary burden for me to carry.  That root thought tainted every aspect of my life.  Fear of failure, Fear of what others would think about me if I screwed up, fear of consequences for doing even the smallest thing wrong.

All unnecessary.

I try to think carefully about what I say now.  When others gossip or talk negatively about someone, I try not to engage and/or I try to change the topic.  I’m not perfect – I don’t succeed at this 100% of the time, but I try.  I try to tell people good things I see about them, to encourage and spread positive energy.

If I, as a Christian, aim to walk like Christ, then my mission is to bring people up, not tear them down.  Consider Mary and Martha in Luke 10:38-42.  Martha, frustrated with doing work in the kitchen by herself, comes out and tells Jesus to scold Mary and send her to help.  Martha felt that Mary was doing the wrong thing because she was out with the men instead of in the kitchen.  Jesus, rather than scold Mary, pointed out to Martha that Mary was not in the wrong because she wanted to learn from him.  Martha could have torn Mary down, made her feel inferior, perhaps even given punishment for not doing what Martha thought was the right thing.  Jesus, on the other hand, gave it a different perspective, lifting Mary up and restoring her sense that what she did was okay. 

I have to be conscious of what I say and how I use my words.  My words can ruin the world or make it a better place.  It’s up to me to choose the words which make this a better life to live.

Amen!  :D