Painting Love

“God’s Word vaults across the skies from sunrise to sunset, melting ice, scorching deserts, warming hearts to faith. As the heavens tower over the earth, so God’s love towers over the faithful. As far as the east is from the west, so far have our sins been removed from us.” (Psalm 19:6; 103:11-12; MSG/NAB)

The Bible can be pure poetry with its imagery. One of the things I love about thumbing through different translations is to read how the same thing is said in different ways. The picture painted for me allows me to transcend the pages and step into the sands of the Israeli deserts.

If you’ve ever watched “Mary Poppins,” you might remember when Mary, Bert and the kids go on an adventure by jumping into one of Bert’s sidewalk chalk drawings. One moment they are standing in the street, the next they are running through a field, encountering dancing penguins, riding a carousel and then riding the painted horses off the carousel and into an animated horse race. All it takes is a little imagination.

This is what the Bible is like for me. I don’t ride carousel horses with Moses or Jesus – although I certainly could if I wanted – but when I get into scripture, really get into it, I’m not just reading words on a page. The Good Book comes alive and I find myself fascinated at the sights, smells and sounds around me.

Last night at my church’s Lenten dinner, our speaker shared many great words of wisdom on the love of God. One of my favorite things she stated, though, was that the Bible is a love story. It’s One Big Love Story all about God’s Love for Us.

The Bible is a love story.

From creation through persecution and into sending his son to live and die like one of us and then triumph over death and evil in the resurrection and ascension, the Bible is an incredible narrative of God’s love for his human children. What lengths, heights and depths he went to to prove his love for us!

I invite you, if you don’t already do this, to pull a Mary Poppins when you read the Good Book. Feel the sand beneath your toes, hear the thunder on the mountain when Moses meets God, see the delight on the faces of the children who flock to Jesus. To imagine being there is to make it feel that much more real and tangible. It aids in a deeply personal relationship with God, something he so desperately wants for us to have.

My prayer today is that as we prepare for the celebration of our Lord’s resurrection, we move toward a resurrection of our childlike wonder. May we allow ourselves to step outside of rigidity and read God’s Word with eager eyes, yearning hearts and open minds. It is the Greatest Love Story Ever Told, and I hope to see you in its pages.

Amen! =D

A House of Prayer for All People

"Make sure no outsider who now follows God ever has occasion to say, ‘God put me in second-class. I don’t really belong.’ … And as for those outsiders who now follow me, working for me, loving my name and wanting to be my servants – I’ll bring them to my holy mountain and give them joy in my house of prayer. They’ll be welcome to worship the same as the ‘insiders.’ Oh yes, my house of worship will be known as a house of prayer for all people.” The Decree of the Master, God himself, who gathers in the exiles of Israel.” Isaiah 56:3, 6-8 (MSG)

Why some insist on picking and choosing scripture that excludes, rejects, condemns and promotes intolerance, I don’t understand. My personal experience of the Good Book is mostly messages of Love, Forgiveness, Acceptance…

Especially if we call ourselves Christians, proclaiming to follow Jesus – who himself said the most important commandments were Love God with everything in you and Love People, too (See Matt. 22:34-40), not to mention he constantly broke religious laws, healed people on the Sabbath, threw a fit and turned over tables in the temple, hung out with the dregs of society and railed against the Pharisees and Sadducees who were so rigid in their rules and traditions, intolerant and unaccepting of those who didn’t think like them (See Matthew, Mark, Luke, John) – it seems we send a conflicting message when we pluck certain condemning scriptures and judge others by them.

As a greater part of my church is in conflict and we strive to discern God’s will nationally, regionally and as parishes and individuals, my constant prayer is for Jesus to be present, that we remember to keep Christ in Christianity.

I praise and give thanks for my own church family, especially as I see those in leadership working hard to keep us moving in the right direction, following God’s will, remaining as bearers of the Good News with our doors, arms and hearts open to all.

“As for me and my family, we’ll worship God.” Josh. 24:15 (MSG)

If you feel rejected, excluded, unloved, or if you’ve turned away from God, Christianity or religion because you feel it has turned away from you, come to my house. Come see God’s love alive and present in my church.* We will welcome you and love you as the Child of God you are.

And if you can’t come to my church, I pray God will lead you to one like it. I’ve been blessed to experience many churches like my own in my travels – I know they exist and are waiting for you. Just ask God to take you there.

Today and all days, I lift up my greater church, all of us who find a home in it, and for Christians everywhere – I pray we keep Christ in Christianity and let his message, God’s message of Love, be that which takes priority above all others.

Amen! =D

*If you are in the greater Charleston, SC area and looking for a church home, feel free to contact me.

Ebenezer (Not Scrooge)

Samuel then took a large stone and placed it between the towns of Mizpah and Jeshanah. He named it Ebenezer (which means “the stone of help”), for he said, “Up to this point, the lord has helped us!” (1 Samuel 7:12; NLT)

Threatened by attack from the neighboring Philistines, the Israelites – who spent twenty years in a “fearful movement toward God” after the last devastating Philistinian attack (1 Sam 7:2) – begged Samuel to pray for them.

“Pray with all your might! Pray to God, our God, that he’ll save us.” (1 Sam. 7:8)

Samuel prayed “fervently,” and as he was praying, the Philistinians crossed the border...  and God scattered them, bringing victory to the Israelites as they chased their enemy out of town. Samuel then raised the Ebenezer.

Ebenezer comes from eben ha-ezer,* Hebrew meaning “stone of help.” Samuel raises the Ebenezer where God brought the Israelites victory, as a reminder that he saved them from the Philistinians.

In most of my translations of the bible this verse ends with some form of, “God has helped us so far.” The Ebenezer serves as a reminder not only that God has helped us up to now, but that, as long as we give our lives to him, God will continue to help us.

I’m a fan of Ebenezers. Though my reminders aren’t typically rocks, I am big on symbolic things that correspond with events in my life, especially when and where God has done major work in me. Things to commemorate experiences, to help me remember them. And I need help remembering!

So whether it is a tattoo on my foot, a ring on my finger, or a coin in my pocket, I cherish my Ebenezers. If I find myself in a place where I am threatened with doubt, I can look at any of these things and remember what God has done for me. I can remember that God has helped me this far, and he’ll continue to help me as I strive to live in this life that he has made.

God, today I ask you to keep me focused, to help me remember how far you’ve brought me and to share your light and grace with others as I move through my day.

Amen!  :D

*NAB footnote

Going on the Of[fence]

Ephesians 5:1-2

“Watch what God does, and then you do it, like children who learn proper behavior from their parents. Mostly what God does is love you. Keep company with him and learn a life of love. Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious, but extravagant.” (MSG, italics mine)

I do my best to love, I really do. Admittedly, I don’t always like other drivers on the road or people who cause me to have to work harder than necessary, but I really do try to have love in my heart for everyone. I pray daily for God to let me be a channel for his love.

Having love in my heart for everyone is actually rather easy. What I find difficult – and I know I’m not alone in this – is caution vs. extravagance for love in action. Loving in a way I thought extravagant, trying to be like Christ, to give, to be kind, etc, has caused me pain, gotten me into trouble, and brought people into my life in a way I didn’t want them to be there.

I am currently taking some fear-based precautions with a new friendship. Recent events during my wilderness time reinforced these fears and sent me racing to the find my bricks and rebuild my walls, the same walls I’ve constructed over years of undesirable experiences. I tend to succumb to isolation. As much as I want people in my life (I really do), I simply don’t trust them (they make it hard). I am safer being lonely (that’s a lie).

In a conversation about this yesterday, though I realized that I am not doing what I’ve always done. I’m not falling back into old patterns despite the fear that I am.  I feel like I am being cautious, but what I am doing is working to enter this friendship slowly and develop appropriate Boundaries.

There’s a book by that name by Cloud and Townsend that has come up several times recently in unrelated conversations with unconnected people. A sign perhaps? I did a small group study on the book four years ago, but I am in such a vastly different place in my life – a place where I feel I really can set healthy boundaries – that picking it up again might not be a bad idea.

The problem with my old walls is that they are old. They have gaps and holes and cracks in all the wrong places from being torn down and rebuilt time and time again. In the book it refers to boundaries being more like a fence than a wall. A fence protects me, yet is still open. And it has a gate. I can talk to a neighbor over the fence without letting her in. I can walk away from the fence if the neighbor tries to attack me.

My walls, however, keep me closed off. They create an extreme of inside and outside with no intermediate space. People try to break in, and if they try to attack me, I can’t see it coming. I am actually more vulnerable with my solid walls than I would be with an open fence.

I just pulled the book off the bookshelf. I’m going to work on tearing down my walls, one-by-one, and putting a nice fence up in their place.

Now the question is, what do I want my fence to look like?

God, help me pull down these walls and put up a fence. Your hands and mine working together, help me to put each board in its appropriate place and properly locate the gate.

Amen!

Working on My Butterfly

Psalm 51:10, 12

“Create in me a pure [clean] heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit to sustain me.”  (NIV)

“God, make a fresh start in me, shape a Genesis week from the chaos of my life. Bring me back from gray exile, put a fresh wind in my sails!” (MSG)

Lent can be a pretty somber time. It is penitential, about self-examination and sacrifice, and as we move through the season in scripture, Jesus moves toward his final hour in the flesh. Yet every Ash Wednesday, after my priest marks our foreheads with ash saying, “Remember you are dust, and to dust you shall return,” after we’ve said a litany of penitence and confessed our sinful nature, the choir sings Create in Me, a song based on the verses above.

Lent is also a time of rejuvenation. It is a time for growth and renewal. And at the end, as the sun and son rise on Easter morning, we can give birth to our new selves, move forward in new lives. Lent is a cocoon. Lent is a retreat for the soul.

Many people give up things for Lent while others add in something new. Growing up, my mom, sister and I attended church, and Mom would make the Lenten resolution for all of us. I swear it was the same every year: No chocolate. Every year, at some point during Lent, a bag of M&Ms would show up in the house.

As a kid, I didn’t understand the significance of giving something up and sticking to it through the season. Even though I attended a Catholic grade school and I am sure was taught about what Lent was supposed to mean, it had no tangible meaning to me. I couldn’t see or understand any of it, and our yearly chocolate routine proved that there were no repercussions for not keeping a Lenten resolution.

So why do we do it? In my current adult understanding, the idea is based upon the fasting that took place in biblical times. Fasting isn’t just about sacrifice, it’s also about turning more of the focus on God. Fasting can be penitential and can allow for heightened awareness. But perhaps most importantly, fasting is a conscious act. A person chooses to fast in order to repent or to grow in a relationship with God.

In my lifetime, I can only think of one time I successfully stuck to giving something up for the entire season of Lent. I have found that I am far more successful if I add something God-focused to my routine. For where I am on my journey, throwing in another devotional or reading a new book (or getting back to Little Meditations) will do more to bring me closer to God.

Besides, I don’t eat nearly enough chocolate these days for it to be a sacrifice to give it up. 

Lord, as I snuggle into this cocoon of Lent with you, let my daily prayer be those lines from Psalm 51: Create in me a clean heart, renew in me a steadfast spirit, restore to me your joy, and grant me willingness. May the things I add or remove with intention this season bring me ever closer to you and help me to live in your will for my life.

Amen.

Did I Remember to Pack That?

1 Peter 1:18a**

“Your life is a journey you must travel with deep consciousness of God.” (1 Pet. 1:18a MSG)

The messages that I am receiving lately are all very much about developing an awareness of and a deeper relationship with God.  I am coming into the understanding that my life will never feel fulfilled without these things.  It is when I drift away – when I lose consciousness – that, in my disconnect, I find myself in discord, prone to confusion, chaos, discontentment, anxiety and fear.

When life seems to get really difficult is precisely when I should stop what I am doing and devote time to getting back to God.  When God gets out of focus, life gets blurry.  I have to make the time to clean my lens and make the appropriate adjustments so I can see clearly before trying to move forward.  What blows my mind is how long it takes me to do this, even when I know how much better it will make everything. 

No, my problems don’t disappear when I reawaken myself to the presence of God.  What changes is how the world around me affects me.  The reason it is said that God’s peace passes all understanding is because it does.  There is no human understanding of the magnitude of God’s peace.

While over and over it is reinforced that we are Loved and that God’s desire is for our joy and to provide us with all we need, it is also said a number of times that there will be suffering.  (It’s in a lot of places in the bible, but you can also find all of it in John 15.)  To have joy does not mean to be without suffering.  What makes all the difference is how I define suffering and how I let suffering define me.

As with many words, suffering has several variations of a similar definition tied to it.  From Merriam-Webster: Suffer – 1)To submit to or be forced to endure; 2) undergo, experience; 3) to put up with, especially as inevitable or unavoidable; 4) to allow, especially by reason of indifference.

It is such a common thing automatically to think of suffering as a negative, painful and unpleasant thing.  It can just as easily be seen as simply another experience.  God said there will be suffering meaning, life isn’t easy.  Stuff happens. 

But suffering does not cancel out joy, and in developing an awareness of God, cultivating a relationship and being deeply conscious of him I can find joy in my life here on earth regardless of my circumstances.  This is how many of the great masters across several religions and philosophies were able to maintain peaceful lives.  This is at the heart of the Way, the Truth and the Light.  This is where it all begins: Deep Consciousness of God.

Dear Lord, even when times are tough, keep me from losing consciousness.  Help me to fully experience life here by living in you, in your love, with your peace and joy through all the hills and valleys of my journey. 

Amen!  :D

**In The Message, this scripture is at the beginning of verse 18.  In my checking against other versions of the bible, comparable language falls at the end of verse 17.  Ever want to check out other translations of the bible without having to buy them?  BibleGateway.com has 30 different English translations as well as translations in many other languages.

BeAT[T]ITUDE

Matthew 5:1-12

Ah, the Beatitudes.  According to Wikipedia:

“The term Beatitude comes from the Latin adjective beatus which means happy, fortunate, or blissful.”

And since there is no such thing as coincidence, it makes me smile that part of the word is “at[t]itude.”  The Beatitudes, from the Sermon on the Mount, are Jesus’ way of condensing all the reasons to count ourselves blessed in life.

Like me, I am sure most who have heard the Beatitudes have heard them in the form of, “Blessed are the...”  This is one of those many instances that very commonly quoted scripture comes across differently in The Message.  At times, since I don’t have book, chapter and verse numbers memorized, I don’t even realize I’m reading the popular verses.  Such was the case when I highlighted Matt. 5:5 some time ago:

“You’re blessed when you’re content with just who you are – no more, no less.  That’s the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can’t be bought.”  Matt. 5:5 (MSG)

I love it.  It’s so beautiful to me.  I often come back to that verse to mull it over and chew on it a bit.  To be content with who I am.  Not to desire anything more, not to think anything should be added, nor subtracted.  To find myself a “proud owner of everything that can’t be bought.”  Peace, love, happiness.  This is how I see it, because to be content with myself is to be at peace with myself, to love myself, and to be happy with myself.  The same for my life situation.  The same for the people God has placed in my life.

I look back and I see how, more often than not, my biggest problem was that I was restless and discontent.  I was not only full of self-loathing, I was overly critical of whatever I may have been doing with my life at the time, always seeing how I could be better, do better, live better.  There was no living in the moment. 

I cannot find contentment if I cannot live in the moment. 

Finding the moment, slowing down – I realize this is God’s purpose behind my time right now, just as it was a couple of months ago.  It is so easy to forget and lose track of time in the busyness of life.  But when I am happy with who I am and happy with my life, there’s no telling what doors could open.  Just as it shows when I am miserable, it shows when I am content.  And prospective employers are only a few of many who are far more likely to be drawn to contentment than misery.  Nothing is more attractive than someone who is content with herself and her life. 

I invite you to read the Beatitudes in my favorite translation.  If you do not own a copy of The Message, I have posted them here.

Here’s to an attitude of blessedness, to contentment, to peacefulness.  May I never forget that God provides me with everything I need, and to be content with who I am, where I am, and what I am doing.

Amen!  :D

Okay, Letting Go of the Branch!

John 15:16a; Psalm 139:15, 16

“You didn’t choose me, remember; I chose you.  I know you inside and out, I know every bone in your body.  Like an open book, I watched you grow from conception to birth; all the stages of your life were spread out before me, the days of all your life prepared before you’d even lived one day.”  (MSG, swapped you’s & I’s from Psalm so God is speaking.)

Today’s inspiration came not from a scriptural devotional, but from AA’s Daily Reflections.  It is only a short little blurb about self-acceptance, but the way the writer worded the last sentence struck a chord with me this morning.

“I pray for the willingness to let go of my arrogant self-criticism, and to praise God by humbly accepting and caring for myself.” (p. 324)

Like so many others, I can be incredibly hard on myself.  At times I set my expectations so high I could never find a ladder tall enough to reach them.  One little mistake at a certain time or place or with certain people will haunt me far longer than it needs to.  And often I find that something I’ve been beating myself up over went completely unnoticed by anyone else in the human world.

It wasn’t too long ago that I often heard it said, “If God can forgive you, then who are you not to forgive yourself?”  Same idea here:

“If God accepts you, who are you not to accept yourself?”

Everyone makes mistakes.  My mistakes are no lesser or greater than others’ in the grand scheme of things.  God made me who I am.  He made me in his image for pete’s sake!  I am “marvelously made!” (Psalm 139:14 MSG)  Who am I to tell God he made a mistake?  Who am I to tell God he went wrong somewhere when he created me?

There is no moment of my life that God didn’t know would happen before time even began.  All things must run their course, so I may as well let go of the branch and hang on to the raft.  The branch, of course, being any mistake or anything over which I am self-condemning.  Staying there I will only flounder and flail in the rushing water, stalling my progress and making things more difficult for myself.  Letting go and hanging on to the raft I can literally go with the flow, dealing with rocks and waterfalls as they come, and not fight against the current.

So my prayer today is to let go of that arrogant self-criticism, remember that I am a child of God, and make a conscious effort to accept myself for who I am, and to love and care for myself, as my Heavenly Father loves and cares for me.

Amen!  :D

I Probably Ought to Get Spiked Shoes for This

Isaiah 2:3

“They’ll say, “Come, let’s climb God’s Mountain, go to the House of the God of Jacob.  He’ll show us the way he works so we can live the way we’re made.” (MSG – italics mine)

This was one of those open the bible randomly to a page & verse with prayerful hand moments.  I read Isaiah 2:1-5, but verse three is what stuck out to me the most. 

At first reading, the second half stuck out – that God will show us how he works so that we can live the way we’re made.  We can live the way we’re made.  And how are we made?

We are made in God’s image.  We are made of love.  We are made of light.

The problem – at least for me – is that it is so easy to get caught up in seeing how the world works that I forget to pay attention first and foremost to the way God works.  So I see what I think the world thinks.

I’m not good enough.  I have friends, but I still feel really alone.  I somehow often manage to do the wrong thing, say the wrong thing, act the wrong way. 

Lies.  Lies the world tells me.  Lies the enemy sneaks into my thoughts.  If I listen to God, if I seek the truth, I hear that I am beautiful, that I am talented, that he loves me and has big plans for me!  So I need to pay attention to what God is doing so that I can see how he works and I can live the way I am made.

In order to do that, however, I must climb God’s Mountain.  And the way that translates to me today is that I have to lean on my trust in God and step out in faith to do that which he is calling me to do.  I must conquer any fear I may have, face the responsibilities he wants to bestow upon me, do the work he has asked me to do and climb that mountain. 

It will not be easy.  Climbing mountains of any kind is not easy.  There are many risks and dangers along the way.  Obstacles to overcome.  Which is where leaning on trust comes into play.  It is through trust in God that I will find confidence – confidence that should my foot slip and I start to tumble backward down his rocky crag, he will catch me and put me right back on my feet.  Confidence that, should I encounter an obstacle which feels far too large for me, God is always bigger and he’s got everything under control.

Thank God!

So here’s to stepping out in faith, to determination, to developing discipline to keep me on the path, to perseverance and to God’s gifts of mercy and grace.

“Come, let’s climb God’s Mountain, go to the House of the God of Jacob. He’ll show us the way he works so we can live the way we’re made.  Come, family of Jacob, let’s live in the light of God.” Isaiah 2:3, 5 (MSG)

Turn Around

2 Corinthians 1:8-9

“As it turned out, it was the bet thing that could have happened.  Instead of trusting in our own strength or wits to get out of it, we were forced to trust God totally – not a bad idea since he’s the God who raises the dead!  And he did it, rescued us from certain doom.  And he’ll do it again, rescuing us as many times as we need rescuing.”  (MSG)

It’s moments like these that I have to shake my head in wonder at my human self.  For the past week and a half, I’ve been struggling.  Nothing near the struggles I used to know, but struggling nonetheless.  Some right decisions took a backseat to impulse, there were a few of those things I had my hands all over even though I knew I needed to be trusting in God.  It was a very typical LKB mix of trying to do too much and not doing anything at all.

I’m sure if I tried hard enough, I could pinpoint all the reasons for my straying from the path these last several days, but more than anything else it is fear.  Whether or not I realize it, and regardless of what is causing the fear, that is generally the root of this type of behavior for me. 

I’ve tried valiantly not to be too hard on myself and cut myself some slack remembering that I am a work in progress and that, comparatively, I’m still doing a heckuva lot better than I used to.  As I picked up my devotionals this morning and saw that I had missed a day or two more of reading than I’d thought, I felt some of those old feelings creeping in again.  But before I had the chance to utter any small prayer for God to help me with them, I saw highlighting on the back of page I was on for one of the devotionals.

It was this verse. 

It’s the reminder that I have to fall prey to my human tendencies to do the wrong thing now and then in order to see again and again the difference that totally and completely trusting God makes in my life.  It’s the reminder that he has rescued me from certain doom (on plenty of occasions!).  It’s the reminder that he will continue to rescue me as many times as I need rescuing.

There’s no limit to God’s love.  And there’s no limit to his mercy.  Every time I turn to run toward him, his arms are wide open, just waiting to embrace me.

Amen!  :D

Look, It Was Your Idea

Exodus 33:12-15

I love this little gem in the story of Moses.  Moses is fed up, frustrated – he was given a job he didn’t want to do, asked to lead an ungrateful group of people with selective hearing, and constantly has to fight for them with the one who asked him to lead them!  Just after the incident with the golden calf, God tells Moses he isn’t coming with them on their journey because he’s over the Israelites’ behavior.  He even says, “I couldn’t stand being with you for even a moment – I’d destroy you.” Exodus 33:5 (MSG) 

So Moses, at the end of his rope, not only calls God out on the irony, he gives him an ultimatum.  He says, “Look, you tell me, ‘Lead this people.’ ... Don’t forget this is your people, your responsibility.”   God says, okay, “My presence will go with you.” 

“If your presence doesn’t take the lead here, call off this trip right now.”  Ex 33:13-15 (MSG)

So my boss has this great idea, gets me in on it with him, has me round up a bunch of people he know will be difficult to deal with, gets me into the middle of a project, gets tired of dealing with the people and tries to send me off on my own to finish the project with them, saying: 

“I’ll be with you in spirit...” 

“Like hell you will!  Your butt will be with me here and now and through the rest of it or else call off the whole thing.  I didn’t get into it on my own and I’m not doing it without you in the lead because this whole thing was your idea!”

I love it!  I love it because it makes God so tangible, which seldom happens  in the Old Testament.  He’s so often this large, raging, cloud, burning bush, wrathful, “Okay, fine, I won’t kill you this time,” God, that to see him in this conversation with Moses puts him on a relatable human level.  Moses is out in the hot sun with the Israelites, doing the hard work, and God just left Starbucks, coffee in hand, pulling out the keys to his BMW, trying to get off the phone with Moses, “My presence will go with you...”

How often I have felt like Moses: God, if you don’t take the lead here, then just call the whole thing off!  I have a vague idea of what I’m supposed to be doing, and I know God’s presence is here with me, but I’d really rather he take the lead and just give me clear instruction on what I am to do and where I am to go. 

But God wants me to do the better part of the work on my own.  Not because he thinks he’s better than me and would rather be cruising around in his BMW, but because he has entrusted me with a task he knows I can accomplish, even if I can’t see that I am capable of it.  He will not leave me high and dry, and as much as I love picturing God glibly saying, “I’ll be with you in spirit,” leaving me to fend for myself, the fact is that he never leaves me.  He really is with me in spirit – always has been, always will be.

So when I next catch myself feeling like Moses in the desert, wanting to throw my phone down and stomp on it in anger because I know God’s got a nice cold iced coffee in his air-conditioned BMW, I will try to remember that God’s not blowing me off.  He’s simply doing what he does, nudging me out of the nest so I can fly on my own.  He’ll never give me more than I can handle (1 Cor. 10:13), and he knows better than I do what I can handle.  He knows when he needs to make the drive out to the desert and bring me some water.

Amen!  :D

"My presence will be with you."

(Photo by Bauer Griffin)

He Knew You'd Click the Link

Psalm 139:13-16

“Body and soul, I am marvelously made!” Psalm 139:14b (MSG)

Oh, how amazing the difference in my attitude toward myself inside and out when I look in the mirror and gleefully say this verse out loud in praise to God!  In this joyful Psalm David shouts his praise to God for how wonderfully God has made him. 

“Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;

you formed me in my mother’s womb. 

I thank you, High God – you’re breathtaking! 

Body and soul, I am marvelously made! 

I worship in adoration – what a creation! 

You know me inside and out,

you know every bone in my body;

You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,

how I was sculpted from nothing into something. 

Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;

all the stages of my life were spread out before you,

The days of my life all prepared

before I’d even lived on day.” 

Psalm 139:13-16 (MSG)

This is a lovely bit of scripture on which I think it would be good to meditate daily.  It’s a great reminder not only of how God “marvelously” made me, but also of how he knows every single moment of every single day long before I ever encounter it.  He knew, for instance, that I would get to writing today’s meditation late because of the string of events – both good and bad – that happened this morning.  And he knew that after I worked through my emotions that I’d be in my usual spot on the couch in front of the laptop asking for inspiration while the sliding glass door was open to the screen so the kitties and I could enjoy the cool fall weather. 

I don’t want to take my moments for granted.  In that moment I spill coffee on my new shirt or that moment I ram my toe with great force into something hard and stationery, I want to smile because I know that God already knew it was going to happen and, somehow, it’s all part of a grander plan.  ...even if that part is God’s comic relief. 

Amen!  :D

He Ain't Lettin' Go

John 6:37

Near then end of my first week in treatment, a rather negative, opinionated girl came to join our community.  Fresh out of detox, she was sick as could be and the only words that came out of her mouth were complaints – usually littered with the “f-bomb” – about how awful she felt, about how much pain she was in, about how she didn’t want to be there, about how everyone was irritating her, about how she couldn’t get what she needed (*ahem* wanted).

Many of the other women in the community paid her no mind except to complain about her as she was always negative, always making our group late, and in general, just a miserable person to be around.  Another young, Spirit-filled lady and I pounced on her the first night we found her unhappy self slouched on the sidewalk by the clubhouse, wrapped in a flannel blanket, pale, shivering and sweaty, freezing and looking like death on a glorious, warm Florida evening. 

She was too sick to get away from us, and complaining or telling us to go away did her no good.  We raved about how life can get better, about the amazing things God could do, about how turning her attention and all the focus from all the bad stuff to something good, even if it was just the thought, “Today, I feel a little bit better than yesterday,” could make an incredible difference in how she entered and came through her recovery.

Queen of the “yeah, buts,” she slowly started asking questions, bringing up issues and ideas that kept her from wanting to believe in God or accept any kind of spirituality into her life.  Many of the other ladies started to see that there was something much more valuable in this young woman and came at her more from a caring mother/sister viewpoint rather than the irritated co-worker viewpoint.  My roommate took her under her wing like a child and all of us worked to show her the love she’d never had in her life. 

I’ll never forget the morning she got into the van and was as bright as the sun.  She’d figured it out, and was experiencing the newness of God’s joy.  That night she handed me a prayer she’d written about accepting Christ into her life and asked if I would find something just for her in the bible to read when we said the prayer together. 

I’m not sure why God worked it out the way he did – it’s not for me to understand – but we never got to pray that prayer.  God had me place her prayer in my bible next to the verse he’d picked just for her, but I never got to read it with her. 

Filled with this new joy and getting this new attention from the kind of people who before may never have given her the time of day, she got distracted.  She fell for one of the guys in treatment and he was good to her, which was also foreign, new and exciting.  The enemy, angry that she had thought about walking away from him reached in and grabbed her and took over just long enough to create a situation which resulted in her removal from the center. 

That night, as my roommate and I sat on our patio, praying for her, I opened my bible to where her prayer and my highlighted verse were.  The verse God had chosen clearly illustrated he knew it would be more for me than it would be for the young lady who wanted him in her life.  He knew we would never read it together, that it would be I coming back to it when I needed to hear it, to be comforted by it.  Because I knew more about the life she’d led, I had grown to love her like a part of my family, and now I watched her having been tossed back into the world unprepared.  I was worried and scared for her, understanding I may never know what happened to her.  But God pointed out to me that Jesus said,

“Every person the Father gives me eventually comes running to me.  And once that person is with me, I hold on and don’t let go.” John 6:37 (MSG)

Amen.  :D

That Wasn't Thunder...

Luke 9:28-36

This passage is typically referred to as the Transfiguration of Jesus since his appearance changes while he is praying.  According to Luke, “at once” after his appearance changed, Moses and Elijah were there with him.  They likely shared wisdom, offering guidance and counsel as they talked over Jesus’ future of death and resurrection.  

The disciples, who just can’t seem to stay awake while Jesus prays on the mountain (see also Luke 22:45; Mark 14:37, 40), suddenly wake up to find their beloved Master with his new dazzling, glorified appearance standing with Moses and Elijah.  Peter, unable to contain his enthusiasm, immediately wants to capture the moment.  Not having a camera, he suggests building three memorials, one for each of the three men. 

Suddenly, a “light-radiant cloud enveloped them.” Luke 9:34a (MSG)  All of my translations but The Message end this verse saying that the disciples were afraid, frightened, even terrified as the cloud rolled over them.  Admittedly, I would be quite fearful if a cloud were to envelope me just after I saw Jesus in his glory standing and conversing with Moses and Elijah.  But The Message gave this verse a much more profound meaning for me.  It spoke to me with such an absolute reaching into my heart that I had to stop for a moment after the first time I read it.

“As they found themselves buried in the cloud, they became deeply aware of God.”

Luke 9:34b (MSG)

Having spent nearly all of my memorable life in pain, despair and depression with only brief respites of happiness or perceived joy, I know what it is to be buried in a cloud.  The idea of finding God in that cloud, the possibility of becoming aware of God in that cloud, is a source of hope for even the least hopeful.  To know that I can be buried at the center of my dark, dark storm cloud and still know that God is with me brings comfort, even if the pain is still there and the darkness has not yet given way to light.

Follow that with God speaking to me in the cloud, pointing me toward Jesus, telling me to listen to Jesus.  Listening to Jesus provides a manual for living a life not so consumed with darkness.  I didn’t always see it that way – I was too far in the cloud and too stubborn to believe there was a way out – but it is true.  It doesn’t mean no more suffering and no more pain, but it does mean peace through every trial, joy in despair, and love that knows no limits. 

As they found themselves buried in the cloud, they became deeply aware of God.  Then there was a voice out of the cloud: “This is my Son, the Chosen!  Listen to him.”

Amen!  :D



©LKB

Holy Spirit, Come on Down!

1 Corinthians 2:6-13

“No eye has seen or heard anything like this,

Never so much as imagined anything quite like it –

What God has arranged for those who love him.” 

1 Cor 2:9

This verse goes hand-in-hand with another popular verse:

“I know what I’m doing, I have it all planned out – plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.” Jeremiah 29:11 (MSG)

When I daily ask God to open my heart so that I may receive his Spirit, he gives me his peace and joy, letting me know that he is right here with me, and promising that, no matter how things may look now, he’s got great plans for me.  But in no other way than inviting the Holy Spirit into my life can I possibly fulfill God’s will and see those plans.  I can’t do it on my own.  But God gives me his spirit and:

“The life-giving Spirit brings wisdom and understanding, gives direction and builds strength, instills knowledge and fear of God.” Isaiah 11:2-3 (MSG)

That same Spirit, “not content to flit around on the surface, dives into the depths of God, and brings out what God planned all along.”  1 Cor 2:10  That same Spirit dives into the depths of God, dives into the depths of me, and brings out the glory and the light and the love – guides me with wisdom and understanding, and strengthens me in God – if only I will ask for it!

 How awesome is that??!

I may have been baptized in the Holy Spirit years ago, but it is my job to continue asking that the Spirit stay with me.  It is all too easy to give in to the world around me, making my heart an inhospitable place for the Spirit to live.

So, Holy Spirit, I most solemnly ask that you dare to dive from the depths of God right into the depths of my soul, penetrating my core, that very first part of me which God formed, and pull those things which God has planned for me to the surface one-by-one, that I may live in his joy and peace all the days of my life.

Amen!  :D

Cuffed to God

Deuteronomy 7:7-9

“God wasn’t attracted to you and didn’t choose you because you were big and important – the fact is, there was almost nothing to you.  He did it out of sheer love, keeping the promise he made to your ancestors.  God stepped in mightily and bought you back out of that world of slavery, freed you from the iron grip of...”  Deut 7:7-8 (MSG)

It is not difficult to bring recovery themes out of many, many bible passages and verses.  The end of verse 8 lists Pharaoh as the one with the iron grip, but for those of us here, now, today, Pharaoh is any number of things.  What is it that holds me in slavery?

I spent many years as a slave to my own psychological and mental complications, a slave to being victimized by merciless bullying, a slave to feelings of unworthiness, a slave to mind-altering substances to make me forget about the rest.  Those were my Pharaohs, and darkness was my Egypt. 

Though I was initially raised in the church, at the age of nine I told my mother Jesus didn’t exist and refused to be a part of any religious activity after that for many years.  By that tender young age I already was living in such darkness that I couldn’t believe there was a God who would save me.  I had no evidence to show me he had any plans to bring me out of my slavery.  And things only grew worse over the years.

In Exodus, Moses follows God’s orders and goes back to Egypt to free the Israelites from slavery under Pharaoh.  Likely, many Israelites didn’t really know God – whether they knew of, but didn’t trust him, or had given up on him because of their life circumstances. So Moses comes back on a mission from God, and immediately, things get worse before they get better. 

Then God brings them out of Egypt, freeing them from Pharaoh.  And they proceed to wander around the desert for 40 years because they still don’t get it.  Instead of being slaves to Pharaoh, they become slaves to their desires of the flesh, things such as idol worship, complaining and worrying – oh, how they became slaves to complaining and worrying! 

Thanks to my human nature, I have the inescapable ability of becoming a slave to just about anything.  Money, food, worry, TV, exercise, work, Solitaire on my phone...  What I must strive to do, where I should put my effort, is to become a slave only to God.  I may have other things in my life, but my main focus, my priority, what in my life I serve and let have and iron grip on my life should be God. 

In the books of the New Testament, Paul, James and Jude all describe themselves as slaves to God and Jesus.  Paul even says at the beginning of Romans that he is a devoted slave of Jesus.  Over and over the New Testament authors speak to how God brought us out of darkness so we no longer have to be slaves to things of this world, but can be slaves to God, walking in his love and light and living a good life doing the right things.    

“Know this: God, your God, is God indeed, a God you can depend on.  He keeps his covenant of loyal love with those who love him and observe his commandments.”  Deut 7:9 (MSG)

Amen!  :D

(Unable to find original source for photo credit.)